Monday, November 7, 2011

Scream With Me

I have a complex where I lust for understanding
until I understand what it means to be existent
and existent means to be empty and empty means to be broken

Fragmenting my thoughts--I can render my consciousness to fractals
and infinitely dull the pain with blunt edges and chemical connection
or maybe instead of chemical ingestion I can find someone else
whose head is filled with distaste at her existence
and we can fuck the hatred out between us until I Am Numb

but with numbness comes coldness and coldness brings distance
distance from one another; God, don't make alone in my existence
I long for the confrontation and transfiguration of the threat of one: loneliness

Loneliness in my head, I want to be understood by someone else
always together, fuck and forget the rest

But the evanescence of ordered-sonics
transcribes my internal cries for connection and
sends it through space, racing for embrace
 from others with beating hearts and bleeding veins
and thoughts of joy and pain until meaning is transported
into another's thought circle and breathes protection from self-inflicted vexes
and now, We Are Not Alone.

I know the world the best when I sing so I sing about everything
with structured winds morphed from breathing and living:
I can be with someone else whose heart beats
and I am not prisoner in a one-by-one cell of bone padded with apathetic hate
for the world I occupy because I can share the hate and so much more

Expression breeds comprehension
Baby, I'm so tired of living inside my head
so this goes out to all the people who get lost in something else
to stave off the emotional compression that reduces everything down to meaninglessness

shout out what you feel
get lost in the scream
scream for connection
scream for human heat

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